Woman up!

Recently I came across this post online.....

and I like it!!! There are many, many things going on in our society that I don't like, but one that is very troubling for me is the idea of gender equality.  Not equal in that one gender is more important than the other, but society trying to make us equal in our roles. 

Thankfully, when God created us He did it with such thought and perfection that we do each have roles that we were designed to do perfectly.  Society is trying to turn women into money making leaders who don't need men!! But we were created to be help mates to each other. 

Without talking out of both sides of my mouth I want to explain that I realize there are some women who are doing just fine without a husband. In some cases, they have been cast into the roles of leader, father, supporter, worker, disciplinarian, etc.. because they had to be. My hat goes off to you ladies!! 

But I'm talking about the fact that it has become a 'BAD' thing in our society for a woman to be a housewife, taking care of her home and family and not earning any money and letting her husband be the head of the family and the leader of the home and making choices for them. 

Instead, our society seems to be pushing women into making career choices, like they 'SHOULD' be earning a living and trying to get women into almost every role that used to be reserved for men.

I, for one, don't see why it's such a bad thing for a woman to be treated as a delicate flower, a princess, a jewel!!! I think it's wonderful when a man opens a car door for a woman, warms her car up for her when it's cold, earns the money to take care of her so that she can care for the home and family, makes sure the car has gas, makes sure the bills are paid, and I could go on and on here but you see what I mean. When did it become a 'BAD' thing for women to be treated with grace and respect and love and concern???

It doesn't make us useless, or less important, or not able to do things. It just means that we have a man who takes on those things for us so WE DON'T HAVE TO!!

Some people won't agree with me but I believe it makes for better wives, better mothers, better relationships all around when we do respect our given roles. When a wife/mother has to do all the things she must do like grocery shopping, cleaning, laundry, carpool, homework help, dishes, kids baths and bed routines, etc... and do all that after working a job, she is one tired cookie!!!

I just believe she doesn't have as much time and energy to do and enjoy things like intimacy with her husband, quality time with the kids, fixing meals for sick family or church members and the list goes on. 

I think society would be much better off if women were more able to care for their home and families and not have to concentrate on making money. 

I do know that one reason this shift has taken place is that more money is needed and not a lot of men can earn enough to take care of all the bills on one income and especially the way we live. We want nice houses, new cars, trendy clothes, expensive shoes, extravagant toys.....I understand because my family is there too. 

By the grace of God we have been able, through the years, to conform our lifestyle so that I can be a housewife. And I thank God that it is important to my husband as well. He sees the benefits of having a wife that is not too overworked.....because it can make us into grouchy people to live with. He sees the benefit of me being able to handle days out of school and sick days with the kids and arrangements and schedules don't have to altered around that. He appreciates that it means I can do school drop off and pick up and piano practice and tutoring and daytime school functions and grocery shopping and all those things that can be handled without his involvement.  That gives him more time to enjoy his time with the family in the evenings because we aren't having to cram all those things into the time after he gets home from work.

I know there are women who want to work and our society wouldn't be the same without them either. We do need women in the workforce!  But, if a woman desires to be a housewife/stay at home mom, let's cut her some slack society.  She is making a choice that is also good!

So I say woman up!!!  Be a woman!! Not a man!! Take on your role of womanhood and all the wonderful things that should come with it, whether you work a job or not.  

I hope one day when my daughter is reaching the age of choosing a career that she looks back on growing up with a mom who didn't hold down a money making job and that she sees the benefits our family had because of it.  I will be proud if she chooses to follow in my footsteps in that way!

Of course, she may choose a career and I will support her and applaud her and encourage her to still be a woman;  a woman with a career, a woman who was created to do certain things and to leave other things to the men in her life.  

THE DREADED PINK RIBBON

You see that pink ribbon there?  The one above?  Yeah, that one.  I don't like it. Let me tell you why.  As the pastor's wife, I have put those pink ribbons on many a person as they were coming into church in the month of October, as we celebrated Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  I've added pictures of it to power point presentations during that same month and done special programs during said month to promote Breast Cancer Awareness.  I've also given gifts with this symbol on it, and oh, how I wish now I hadn't.  I've given them to women who were fighting breast cancer and it seemed like a good idea. I thought it was the right thing to do.  Well, now that it's me in the chair, I know better!!

Not long after being diagnosed with breast cancer, I received a couple of gifts with this symbol on it. (It was near Christmas so gift-giving season was upon us :-)  And I resented it so much at the time. I felt like all of a sudden I was supposed to wear this pretty pink ribbon upon my chest to proclaim not that I was bringing awareness to breast cancer, but that I HAVE breast cancer. Much like Hester Prynne in The Scarlet Letter, I felt like it was a blazing symbol on my body to say, look at me!!  look what I have!!  feel sorry for me!!  pray for me!!  I have breast cancer!!  

And I didn't like it ONE BIT!!!

Pink ribbons belong to October right??  Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Oh, I'll gladly wear one then to show support of raising money for research, to show support for those fighting it, to encourage others to get their mammograms and do their self-checks.  But wear one all the time?? No! Somehow to me it seemed like it went from the ribbon being a symbol of breast cancer awareness to a symbol of breast cancer victim!

I wouldn't use my gifts. Wouldn't wear them! I was retaliating!!!  I would not pronounce to the world that I had this disease and make them look at me with pity. I just wouldn't.  And it had nothing to do with who the gifts came from. I knew those people meant well. They gave them to me as a show of love and support and thank God for those people.  But, not the gifts!  Not that pink ribbon!

Thankfully, as I've gone a little further into this life with breast cancer, I've mellowed about it a bit. I've worn one of those gifts and there's another I'll wear soon because it is jewelry, which I love, and it's beautiful!!  In my mind I'll try to say I'm wearing it with pride to express that I'm fighting breast cancer and I'm winning the fight so far. I will want to wear the pink ribbon like Superman and pump out my chest, arms stretched to reveal it, and feel like a superhero.  

But, I won't. 

I just know somewhere in a tiny corner of my heart that I'll feel like it's just a blazing symbol of what's going on in my body, displayed for all the world to see. 

WELL, THAT HURTS!!! AND THE LEARNING CURVE

Yay Me!! I made it through my surgery for breast cancer. They took out all of the cancerous lump and found nothing in the lymph nodes that they removed and tested.
And in place of it they left me with wounds that are quite painful. The first one to bother me was the port! I was thinking that it must be more painful to 'put' something in than to 'take' something out.
After a week I can say that I was wrong. The spot where the lymph nodes were removed has by far been the most painful. It has limited my mobility in my 'main' arm, the right. But we aren't going to fuss with minor details that are temporary. We are going to thank GOD for the wonderful results and move on.....

this may seem a strange picture to put here, BUT my tumor was 1.7cm, this will give you some idea....not very big to the cancer world but giant to me!

Turns out that when you find out you have breast cancer, cancer takes on a whole new form. There were so many things that I thought about CANCER and the people with it that are just not true. One thing I've learned is that the doctors aren't very concerned about the breast cancer they find. They can deal with those tumors by taking them out rather quickly. It's the chance of cancer being somewhere else and coming back...the cancer they don't know about....that they are concerned with. And it turns out that's what all the treatments are for after you have surgery.

The chemo and the radiation, all for things that may happen down the road. I thank God there has been research into what is the best way to insure women survive and don't have a recurrence. And I pray they one day will be able to find a cure for all cancers!!

Although the docs don't expect the kind of treatments I will be getting to make me very sickly, they have said I will probably lose my hair. I can honestly say that is not a major concern for me. Only that I hope is my hubby and kids won't think it's too strange. My hair will grow back and if it's the most major thing I lose from having cancer, then I am blessed.

One thing I hope I don't lose is my peace of mind. God has given me a peace about everything I have been through and will go through with this, but I mean after I'm 'cured' of this breast cancer. I hope and pray I won't spend the next 20 years of my life being scared it's coming back somewhere else. That's why they're putting me through treatments in the months to come, to avoid that right???

I was diagnosed with cancer just before Christmas and even though it's a sentiment that I've heard all my life, I can tell you it took on a whole new meaning for me this past year.  "Do not be afraid, I bring you good news!"  The angel told the shepherds this in the Christmas story and it seems like everywhere I turned this past season, there was that line. In Christmas cards, on Tv, in plays, in songs, lots and lots of places.
"Do not fear!!! I bring you good news!!"  He indeed brought me good news and so I must obey Him.  DO NOT FEAR!!

OK, God, if you say so!!!!